Saturday, July 2, 2011

Off-beat Holidays - July

 Just a side note before the list: This is my third month listing holidays (see June is here and May is here ) and I am beginning to notice there are a boatload of days devoted to food!! There are at least 9 days devoted to food and drink in the month of July alone. And people say we Americans have weight issues??? No kidding!

1: Canada Day – Or as Americans tend to refer to them; the quiet neighbors to the north. As the rest of the world tends to sees it; the quiet and peaceful folks living above a college frat kegger.
1: International Chicken Wing Day – Buffalo, NY’s contribution to the appetizer menu
1: Second Half of The Year Day – Half-way through the year. Here’s to a better half (I hope)
1: U.S. Postage Stamp Day and Zip Code Day - Maybe these are a partial explanation for the term "going postal"??
1-3: Rosewell UFO Days: - Maybe this should be take a Martian to lunch day
2: I Forgot Day – I had a pithy comment for this day, but, I can’t quiet remember what it was
2: International Cherry Pit Spitting Day
2: International Day of Cooperatives – A United Nation’s recognized observance. “Cooperatives around the world celebrate the International Day of Cooperatives in many ways. Activities include: messages from the International Cooperative Alliance (ICA) and the UN translated into local languages for worldwide distribution; news articles and radio programs publicizing the awareness of the day; fairs, exhibits, contes…” Yeah, now I know why I’ve never heard of it.
3: Compliment Your Mirror Day - If you do maybe your mirror will make your look like Bradley Cooper… or Shania Twain??
3: Stay Out Of The Sun Day – It’s July people, ain’t gonna happen!
4: Fourth of July or Independence Day - A day citizens of the United States celebrate by getting drunk and blowing shit up. Yeah!!
4: Independence From Meat Day – on a day celebrated by barbequing hot dogs and hamburgers?? REALLY???
4: Indivisible Day – Just imagine the possibilities… oh wait, I thought that said invisible... oh well
5: Earth at Aphelion
5: Bikini Day – YES!!!
6: Take Your Webmaster to Lunch Day – I wonder who thought this up and what kind of sacrifices we should make gifts we should give to honor the overlords of the internet?
7: Chocolate Day – This just has to be a big day in Hershey PA
7: Father-Daughter Take A Walk Together Day
7: Tell The Truth Day – If you do this it's probably a good thing that the 7th is also Global Forgiveness Day
8: SCUD Day (Savor the Comic, Unplug the Drama) – Turn down the drama, turn up the comedy. The Three Stooges always make me laugh!
9: Rock And Roll DayYEAH!!! ROCK ON!!! TURN IT UP!! Play some Aerosmith!
9: Bald In-Bald Out Day – we come into the world bald, naked and crying. I think I’m about half way to bald out…
9: Hop A Park Day - July is National Parks and Recreation Month. Visit a local or state park and see what’s going on in your area
10: Don't Step On A Bee Day – hell, this is EVERY day in my book.
10: Piña Colada Day – I’ll be busy this day. At the bar. Drinking a… well, you know
11:World Population Day - "Everyone Counts. Counting everyone is an integral part of ensuring that we take everyone into account…" Shut The Front Door! Sounds like government gobbledygook to me
11: International Town Criers Day – Hear Ye, Hear Ye!!
13: Embrace Your Geekness Day – Again, this is an everyday thing for me
13: Gruntled Workers Day – HA!! I love this! I’ve always known that unhappy workers could be called disgruntled, but, have often wondered if you could be called “gruntled” if you were happy! Cool! Now, on to disheveled and sheveled
15: Gummi Worm Day – yet another day celebrating the stuffing of one's face
16: Hot Dog Night and Hot Dog Night - a day for weiners everywhere. Wait, didn't he leave office?
16: Cow Appreciation Day – not if you’re making all beef frankfurters it ain’t
16: Toss Away the Could Haves and Should Haves Day – Well, I should have tossed out the could haves. And I could have, really, but, something told me I shouldn’t. So I didn’t, though I could have. Awww crap, my brain hurts!
16: Woodie Wagon Day – I saw woodie and got all excited. That was before I read the second word
17: National Ice Cream Day - (3rd Sunday) – I’ll take mint chocolate chip please
17: Wrong Way Corrigan Day – Wrong Way Corrigan was so infamous that the character Captain Peter “Wrong Way” Peachfuzz, the world's worst sailor was developed as a tribute of sorts in the old Rocky and Bullwinkle Show
18: National Get Out of the Doghouse Day – yeah, if only I could
18: Global Hug Your Kid Day – We need a day for this? Seriously??
19: Flitch Day - (Note: Some also say it's always the 3rd Saturday)
20 : National Lollipop Day - I'm not gonna say it...
21: Get to Know Your Customers Day - (also January 20, April 21 and October 20) – if this was done every day, maybe so many businesses wouldn’t fail. I’m just sayin’…
21: Legal Drinking Age Day -  21 – Ironic, no???
22: National Penuche Fudge Day – Please, don’t tell my wife
22: Rat-catchers Day
22: Spooners (Spoonerism) Day - Have you ever meant to say “this is the fun part” and had it come out “this is the pun fart”?? Or watched a butterfly flutter by??
23: Gorgeous Grandma Day – This one is just too easy, so, I’ll leave well enough alone
23: Hot Enough For Ya Day – Yeah, and I’ll choke the first SOB that says it too
24: Cousins Day – another one that’s far too easy and better left alone.
24: National Day of the Cowboy – A day to protect and preserve our Western Heritage. So, hide your copy of “Broke Back Mountain”
24: National Drive-Thru Day – Drive thru tellers, drive thru restaurants, drive thru pharmacies, drive thru liquor stores. We Americans have gotten so lazy we’d do a drive through wedding if it were possible (and I’m sure it is)
24: Tell An Old Joke Day - A priest, a rabbi, a nun and a minister walk ito a bar. The bartender looks up and says "Is this some kind of  freakin' joke??"
24: Coffee Day – French vanilla please, just cream
25: Carousel Day or Merry-Go-Round Day – go take a spin
24: Parents' Day - (4th Sunday) Call your parents if they are still with you.
25: Thread the Needle Day - Note: This is a traditional church game played in the Spring. It really can be played anytime
25: Act Like a Caveman Day – Grab a club; thump your potential mate on the head. Drag him or her back to your cave.
26: Take Your Dog to Work Day – Really???
27: National Korean War Veterans Armistice Day
27: Barbie-in-a-blender Day - I always wanted to do this to my sister's dolls... maybe today is the day!!
27: Take Your Houseplant for A Walk Day: – Seriously??
27: Walk on Stilts Day – with your houseplants – or your daughter. Go on, mash it up… be daring!!
28: National Milk Chocolate Day and National Chili Dog Day - Cool!! Dinner and dessert!

29: Lasagna Day - Who doesn't like a good lasagna? 
29: Rain Day - I'm curious; if it rains on Rain Day, is there a rain date??

29: Lumberjack Day – “I’m a lumberjack and I’m okay, I sleep all night and I work all day! I cut down trees. I wear high heels, Suspendies, and a bra. I wish I'd been a girlie, Just like my dear mamaw”  Bless “Monty Python’s” twisted mind

29: National Talk in An Elevator Day – Go ahead, freak someone out and say something!
29: System Administrator Appreciation Day - (Last Friday)
30: Cheesecake Day - New York style, with strawberries
30: Father-In-Law Day - I’ve been a father-in-law for years and have never heard of this one.
30: Paddle for Perthes Disease Awareness Day  - Always last Saturday

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